Friday, July 28, 2006

It was just that kind of night.

A bunch of us went out for drinks after work (here, and it was awesome). I had never been there before (had I been paying we wouldn’t have stayed either) and it was gorgeous. It was a beautiful breezy night and we parked ourselves in a corner with a great view of the Harbor. I’m standing there (feeling very new York, thank you very much), sipping my Belvedere & Tonic and feeling pretty good. All of a sudden, I decide that I’m going to tell them.

I’ve outed myself. I finally told people at work that we are adopting. Prior to yesterday there were only three people that knew and I swore them to secrecy. Can you believe it – I did not get ONE stupid comment. NOT ONE! I am so amazed, especially since there was alcohol involved, and people are exceptionally loose lipped after a few drinks. I had braced myself for it, I figured there had to be at least one “what an honorable thing to do” or maybe a “now you’ll get pregnant”. But surprisingly not. Only warm hearted congratulations, a lot of “how exciting” and “how wonderful. A few people asked me questions, but it was normal stuff, like what gender, how soon, what country. A lot of people told me how someone close to them was also adopting. I think they all must have figured that news was coming…I am no spring chicken and they must all have been wondering why we had no kids yet. And they gave it the appropriate level of attention too…know what I mean? They didn’t dwell on it, but didn’t blow it off either. I was actually happy I told them, go figure! When I told my boss I was outed (and he was allowed to talk about it if asked), he said, “good, why shouldn’t you share that kind of exciting stuff?” (lot’s of reasons actually, but let’s stay positive, here, shall we?) Now if we could only get my family to react that way….

Speaking of which, my SIL (I think I need to come up with a good nickname for her - suggestions welcomed) called my husband and asked him if he liked the Jeep Stroller. I can’t imagine her spending this kind of money, so I’m thinking someone must be selling it or better yet throwing it out.

And no I171H yet!! Come on work with me here people!! I’m dying over here!!!

Nothing much else to say. I’m tired of thinking about adoption really. The process, the stigma, other people’s opinions, the comments, my anxiety, all of it. Just call me when the kid’s ready and I’ll come pick him up. (Ooh Freudian slip? Notice I said him and not her?). From that day on I’ll just be plain ol’ “mom” and like it.

15 comments:

-Jenny said...

BOY!!! BOY!!!
I was thinking today that I have no idea boy or girl!

That "place" sounds heavenly. My favorite places in big Cities are the 4 Seasons bar. LOVE them. So cool and ritzy. I will sit with my bloody mary and just soak it in.

have a great weekend, and I would say, giving away for free! Ha.

Margaret said...

Congrat on coming out of the adoption closet. I've never been able to be quiet about it. The woman who delivers my mail knows I'm adopting. I just have different levels of the story that I tell people.

I'll start doing the I-171H dance for you!

del said...

That's wonderful that no one said anything stupid--how often does that happen?? It's nice that others can share in your joy.

MAMB said...

Congrats on coming out! You kept quiet longer than I was able to. I haven't told everyone in the office but I told several friends at work right away. From there, if it came up I shared, if not I didn't go out of my way to tell anyone. So about 1/3 of my office probably knows. I was excited to talk about it but now I am sick of it. I have no news and no pictures to share. Trust me, you'll all know when I do. But they have all been very supportive and are actually pretty good about not asking questions.

Tricia said...

It must be nice to be open about it at work - since it's such an important thing in your life. I told everyone last year, and even though we haven't started I get questions about the adoption at least 2-3 times a week from co-workers. Imagine when we finally have some news!

Have a great weekend! Come on 171H!

Tiff said...

It's odd...I am kind of sick of thinking about the whole thing too. It's a LONG road, isn't it?!

Kay/Hanazono said...

Yay for your coworkers being so supportive of your adoption!

And boooo for USCIS for not getting your (or my) I171-H out yet! Keeping my fingers crossed that they both come soon :)

jill said...

steph - i am so psyched that you had such a warm and terrific response from your co-workers..

you deserve that!

Chris & Michelle Sapp said...

Just happened to stumble upon your blog - congratulations! My mother said I started talking about my adoption plans when I was in the second grade :-) Just wanted to offer your encouragement and support! We adopted two curious, wonderful, beautiful, loving children in December from Kazakhstan! I can't remember my life without them!

Michelle

Our story:
www.sappfamilyadoption.blogspot.com

Carrie said...

Yeah! It's great that you were able to tell everyone about your plans (a definite load off) and they were all supportive! On top of drinks at that fab place...sounds like it was your night!

Crossing my fingers that your I171H arrives soon!

Dawn and Joe De Lorenzo said...

We're still waiting for our I171h too - I feel your pain! I also understand being sick of the entire process. I am a teacher and will probably be glad to get back to work in Sept. and get my mind off the wait. I'll keep you in my prayers. By the way - I registered for the Jeep Umbrella Stroller ($30).

Lauren&Marco said...

It's coming! I just got mine Last Monday and another one of our blogger friends got their's Friday...email me when you have time I need to tell you soething but can't find yoru email

Amy Lane said...

Congrats on coming out...and I'm glad you did tell people early--my friend told me about her adoption about 2 weeks before it went through and I had very little time to make her a gift... (you're a knitter Stephanie--you know what I'm talking about!!!) And I think the whole 'I'm sick of talking about it I want it to start' thing is for every parent, incubative, adoptive, or animated... (before the end of my pregnancies I conciously forgot I was pregnant because, MY GOD did I want another topic of conversation--car repairs, traffic cops, my moronic administration ANYTHING...)
congratulations on coming out though...I'm rooting for your paperwork to come through...

Elle said...

so happy to hear your co-workers are supportive. Mine tend to be too, but they ask constantly. It gets old.

I vote BOY!!! Just because, lets face it. Boys are just better.

Dude, next time you are in the Times Square area can you stop by the Stage Deli and send me a sandwich? Deli's suck ass here.

jeneflower said...

I am with you on tired of everything. Actually exhausted. When people here ask me about our whirlwind trip to Russia I answer- "It was very whirlwindish" and change the subject. Just because I am so tired of recounting. I think our daughter will speak for herself when she comes and I won't have to explain everything.

I am so jealous of your great night out. I need one of those.