Sunday, July 22, 2007

A little follow up..

Can I tell you what is just so funny....I was cracking up that everyone was saying how brave and daring I was to go camping, and that I am such a trooper. I really wish you could have seen the first draft of that post. After I wrote the whole thing I thought "Wow, I am a total negative complainy beyotch, lighten up Francis, it wasn't THAT bad".

But the truth is I mostly hated it.
The baby part was really not so bad - we are one of those really obnoxious couples that is blessed with a naturally good baby... he really doesn't cry unless he has good reason (don't worry, I'm sure God will get me back in the toddler years). The worst part was with me. We got up so early on Friday morning I didn't shower. If I don't wash my hair every single day I get so greezy you can fry an egg on my head. So by mid day I was a wrinkled, no makeup wearing, tired, cranky greasy headed mess. I was especially cranky when I had to get out of the car and let other humans see me. I know I should have a "screw 'em" attitude, but you know, us fat girls can NOT be going out of the house like that. We rely on the hair and makeup to distract others from the not so pretty parts. So I was definitely not a happy camper (ha! that never gets old!). I had a good day on Saturday because I got to shower and dress somewhat nicely. Sunday was downhill again because it was raining so hard I just wanted to get packed and leave, so again I didn't shower. Big mistake. When we got home my bro was there with his girlfriend, who is skinny and always dressed nicely and although she is very nice I always feel like a bit fat schlub around her. Anyway, you didn't come here to hear all that did you?
Changing subjects.... remember the friend that told me he and his wife couldn't have children? Well I read all of your comments and decided that I would send an email, short and sweet like you said, and without mentioning adoption. It basically said that I knew we kind of got awkward there for a minute, but I wanted to let him know that I knew how he felt and that if he ever needed a sympathetic ear, I was available. I didn't hear anything back from him for several days. I thought "oh great, now he's pissed". I would have expected at least a "thanks" in return, even if he was mad or whatever. But then I saw him in person again, and at the end of our conversation he acknowledged the email. He said he really appreciated it and that it was very nice of me to send it. It seemed like he was trying to get across that his situation DOES really suck and that it might really STILL be sucking pretty bad. I have no idea when they stopped treatment - who knows it could just have been recently. So in the end, I was glad I sent it. Maybe someday he'll ask me more about adoption...I really hope so. I mean, does anyone ever really stop wanting to have kids? I know there are some people who never try and aren't interested, and that's fine...but if you go to the trouble of going through treatments, you've got to want it pretty bad, right?. You can't just turn that off. How can adoption not be an option? I don't think money is the problem. I think it must be that they need some more time to grieve.
*sigh* Whatever Starfish, you can't fix everyone's problems.

In happier news, I have entered Sig's Monday Giveaway this week. Somehow I lost touch with my friend Sig and her beautiful guatemalan daughter, but now I'm back (I did some house cleaning in blog lines and think I've got it all worked out now). To enter the giveaway, I have to tell you who my secret fantasy men are. Okay, these run the gamut, and you are NOT allowed to hold these against me!

Okay, no secret that I like this guy, although "hot" is probably not the right word. I am a total sucker for a nice smile:Another obvious choice, and another great smile:

Kind of have a thing for this guy too:

I've loved this guy forever:And this guy too (see a trend here - tall, dark and handsome is my thing)

Okay, now for my closet crushes (shhh don't tell)
I'll bring your sexy back baby...
Lead singer of my favorite band. Although in my fanstasy he looks like he used to: And not what he looks like now (yikes!)


Elle said...

ohh, Johnny Depp makes me drool a little. I might have to enter that contest. I haven't read Sig's blog in about forever.

Jane-Jane said...

I have been out of the loop for awhile now... June and July are CRAZY in our home. Your friend: from my perspective infertility sucks. We (my husband and I) are not on the same page. As if infertility was not enough, we are now dealing with two totally different directions that we want to go.... all that to say that keep in mind that they are two totally different people and may have different desires for the outcome.

Julie said...

Hmm...we totally share the dude who plays Jim. I'm also harboring an embarrassing crush on David Beckham. Since I left high school, I've been off the sporty types, but for some reason he sets off all the alarms ;)

Anonymous said...

LOL, when did the guy from Counting Crows get breasts??? I used to listen to them & I can't even remember his name. OMG, that pic was so funny.

And you WERE brave to go camping. I'd never do that, unless I was in a cabin with electricity & a bathroom. Maybe that defeats the purpose of camping, but whatever.

I wouldn't worry about Sea Monkey going bad in the toddler first one was just like that & when she was 2 & 3, she was still the best behaved child. Even now, she's a sweetie.

Beagle said...

OK, so first off, it's your blog and you can complain about your hair, the weather, etc., anytime you want, but secondly, if you end it off with a bunch of hottie pics, well, that really balances things out, doesn't it!!

I think your friend might come ask you more in time. For some people the biology is harder to let go of than for others. They also may still just be too worn out to venture in a new direction. (That's how I felt at first.) And when they're ready, you'll be there for them. Having you to turn to will be a great place to start.

ruth said...

Loved your camping pictures, and the eye-candy today.

Kerry said...

I wish I had known you were going to be camping so close by! We're only an hour from Plattsburgh! :-)

wavybrains said...

It's okay to whine about camping. I'm pretty sure I'd be whining too :)

About your friend, I have a hard time understanding people for whom adoption isn't an option b/c I wanted to adopt long before I knew I had PCOS. But, through infertility blogs, I've run across many individuals for whom adoption just isn't an option: insurance coverage for treatment, but no $$ for adoption, family prejudices, adult adoptees, history making adoption harder than usual, and while I wouldn't make their choices, I've seen a number of people end treatment and not even consider adoption. For them, the goal appears to be something more specific than just "parenthood." I hope your friend finds a way to whatever his goal is, or finds a new goal.

Chebbles' Mama said...

I know how you feel about the lack of showering = cranky feelings. My husband gets so annoyed with me on this one topic, "Why does our life have to revolve around your showers?" Well, it's either that or cranky pants.

And I think you did the right think in that e-mail to your friend. My husband and I chat about adoption with some regularity. I'm a big proponent (hence my fascination with your blog list) and he's very uncertain about it. I don't know if he'll ever change his mind about it -- so perhaps some couples are in this kind of limbo... forever?

Rob, Dana, & Billy said...

Well I'd have to say you have pretty good taste in men!

Samantha said...

I've never been camping, so I can't really imagine it with a baby too, even a really good-natured one! At least you got to have some Magic Hat (I do love that beer).

I'm glad you emailed your friend. It sounds like he's in a really raw spot right now, but he may decide to take you up on your offer in the future.

Andrea said...

Oh yea, I can totally relate to the crazy hair after no shower thing. Naturally curly hair + no showering = not very happy me. Between that and my contacts, and not really wanting to wear my glasses all weekend, I don't dig camping.

But I DO dig your eye candy today. Nicely done!

Jenny said...

OK...Honestly, I can NOT see you camping. And I would be a crab with no shower too!

And you like dark huh? No beckham. I am in love with him now. He is soo sincere and smart and hot and even the nutty wife isn't as bad as some. But that Depp still tops my list.

Miss Scarlett said...

Isn't it kind of awful to feel that way? Like you can't go out looking however because you are fat? I get that loud and clear sister, but aren't we kind of mean to ourselves? One day.

Some kids just stay happy, calm and non-beastly their whole lives -maybe you have hit the baby jackpot!

Glad to hear that you sent your friend the e-mail - maybe they do need more time. Good that you were able to just listen to him say what he was feeling.

Ooooh look at those eye candy the 1st guy too - sweet and great smile goes a long, long way!

But that Depp. Yowza!

Ok - I had no clue that the guy from Counting Crows looks so much like Sideshow Bob these days, that's a shame!

Good luck with your contest entry.

Jane-Jane said...

I have GREAT stickers for you... the building ones (cause all boys like building and trucks... and some CAMPING stickers that I am willing to share with you, and some of my beach stickers too.) I don't think I have your e-mail, so if you can drop me a line at jjinusa at gmail, I will get them too you!

Thank you for your encouragement about my husband and I being on the same page.... we are at least "reading" from the same book now. And for that I am truly grateful to God for changing both our hearts.

jessie s said...

we're in love with the same men! (Ha!)

But your baby is cuter than ALL OF THEM! :-D So happy for you!

Ani said...

I'm in love with Johnny Depp too - and John Stamos and Rob Lowe round out my list. I'm a sucker for tall men with dark hair and blue eyes... interestingly, my hubby has green eyes... close enough :)

Maggie said...

I know... Counting Crows has become Counting Crow's Feet. It's just sad.

btw -- Thanks for your offer of Colombian Pesos. Slugger would really appreciate it! I can't find your email though. Shoot me an email at theopenwindow (at) charter (dot) net and I'll send you my address. Thanks!

Julie said...

Hey--you inspired part of my latest post, a meme. You're tagged! It's at